Not everyone understands domestic violence. People are quick to say I would never accept that behavior, but they have never experienced the subtle mind games they play. They keep you so confused you don’t even realize what is happening until after you’ve been sucked in.
Domestic Abuse
With an Abuser, Nothing is Off Limits
In honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month (October), I asked the ladies in our online group to share their stories and the challenges and difficulties they faced while in their abusive situations. Here' the first in a series. Many thanks to this dear woman for...
This is the Face of Domestic Violence
I went from working at a high paid job in Silicon Valley at Google to leaning on charity and government programs. I was so ashamed, I didn’t want to tell friends or family I was back and why. It all seemed so surreal, so sudden, so unexpected. I hadn’t planned for it to really come to this. I always tried to keep believing the best, hoping the best, praying for my husband, forgiving and forgetting. But my husband wasn’t changing and leaving became necessary.
Will Abuse in the Church Overshadow Greear’s “Gospel Above All” Agenda?
I couldn’t help but think how often the gospel has been tarnished by evangelical churches in their handling of domestic violence and sexual abuse, and couldn’t help but think that if nothing changes, the gospel will continue to be maligned by the very people who claim its power.
A Domestic Violence Advocate’s Plea to the SBC
I believe that leaders who are wiling to learn should be commended, and am glad that many important points were shared by someone who has far more influence than I do, so praise God that he shared what he did.
Repentant Abusers & Hard Hearted Victims?
We don't often post our videos on this blog, but we've received so much feedback on this one, we decided to do it. It's long but worth your time if you're a people helper and want to know the common pitfalls helpers (counselors, friends, pastors) often face when...
Don’t Confess Your Sins to an Abuser!
HOW COUNSELING VICTIMS TO CONFESS THEIR SIN EMBOLDENS ABUSERS Last week in our support group for survivors of domestic abuse, one of the participants approached me after class to tell me about a counseling session she had with a biblical counselor at her church a few...
This week I was featured on my friend Chris Mole's Peaceworks podcast. He interviewed me, and asked me to share my story of survival, as well as how Called to Peace Ministries got started. Click here to listen.
The Self-Righteous Face of Abuse
We need to realize that there are wolves disguised as sheep among us. They know all the right words. They can quote the scripture, and be extremely persuasive, but their knowledge is merely head knowledge. They twist the truth to oppress rather than set free. Their knowledge of God is faulty, and they use their warped view of him to tear down rather than restore.
“Hopeless” is a LIE!
Christmas Day 1995 was one of the worst days of my life. It wasn’t just bad because of the magnitude of horrendous things I had endured up until that point—it was terrible because I had lost hope. In my journal that day I wrote: It's been a rather lousy day- I keep...
When Your Abuser Turns the Children Against You
Lately our ministry has seen more than its fair share of mothers* struggling to co-parent with abusive spouses and partners. Not only do they worry about sending their children off to spend unsupervised time with spiteful exes, many even find their children turning...
How Can I Ever Forgive Myself?
"How can I ever forgive myself?" It's a question I've heard many times in my years of counseling. In fact, I get it! I know very well how it is to be plagued with guilt and remorse over a bad decision. When I finally broke free from a 23 year abusive relationship, I...